Do not fear, I'm not going to quote the entirety of the bible here, although this place could do with a bit of Ecclesiastes. If that is even how you spell it. Good old Solomon. Anyway, enough of all things religious.

Greetings and Salutations to all those readers who haven't lost interest in the little preamble at the beginning. I, the Talented Mr Skibot (more commonly known as Ski, Sam, Hey You!, Pedro [vote for Pedro], and also just as a grimace, but that's not really a name) and I have recently purchased this handy piece of real estate. Well it is more like fake estate, or virtual estate, but let's not get caught up on technical difficulties here - it's not the O.J Simpson trial! Kudos to them too, all those involved with his trial. Sticky situation that - not guilty in the criminal court because of a leather glove being too small to fit his hand (despite leather shrinking when it gets wet) yet guilty in the civil court. Dear me, the trials and tribulations of the justice system.

You see that? I suppose you would have because you just read it, but that's beside the point. The point is, the above paragraph was amble. It is not preamble, because the preamble was even above that. It is not postamble, for there is yet more amble after it. It is, therefore, amble. Get used to it; it seems that all I write is amble; no meaty controversial essays or interesting sagas, just a whole lot of absolute crap. I'm allowed to use the word crap on the internet aren't I? *g*

Anyway, those who are still reading are more than likely friends of mine, so you need naught of the following. Those who do not know me but are still reading are obviously lacking the capacity to do something constructive with their time (hey, we got something in common!) and will probably ignore the following. So the only real purpose of writing it is to relieve some of my boredom, and to prolong the commencement of my culminating assignments. I'm not even going to start the assignments for a while yet anyway, and hell I'm not even bored! So there is absolutely no point in writing the following. I might as well be trying to carve a refrigerator into the shape of a single white rose with a plank of wood. But this is much easier, and involves less work. Naturally, I'd rather do less work. Anyway, as for the pointless stuff that nobody could care any less for even if they really tried their best to do so.

As you may or may not be aware, I am not the most emotive person that has walked on the earth. I have few dislikes, and even fewer likes. But I might as well share them, eh? I like ignoring even the most blatant spelling mistakes (which is why they are plentiful throughout this entry - run spell check? Not likely), drinking coke out of a thin glass with ice, listening to all my friends 'teenage crush' problems and laughing at them for such tomfoolery, and above all else I love feigning talent so that people actually believe I am talented at even the smallest thing in this world, instead of the much harsher truth that I am a little more than a destroyer of the ozone layer, a devourer of forests and a killer of animals. But hey, what can you do. That reminds me - if anybody comes across something I'm talented at, please let me know. It seems to be escaping me for my entire life.

Some other things I consider myself fond of are Tolkien, Led Zeppelin, Hungry Hungry Hippo's, Douglas Adams, Napoleon Dynamite, The Who, Nirvana, The Smashing Pumpkins, Everclear, Grinspoon, Probot, The Sex Pistols, The Red Paintings, The Whitlams, Placebo, melted ice cream, op-shopping, writing stuff (anything – books, short stories, stage plays…), designing slogans for t-shirts, C.S Lewis, Wil Smith (his movies - his music is atrocious), Sean Bean, Bernhard Hill, Sir Ian Mckellen, reading the comic series "Thor", writing comic strips, sleeping, diet coke, Dodgeball, thrash out, Peter Sellers, being told I’m appreciated, making people laugh, swinging in that nifty park down by my house, inside jokes, vintage...just vintage, the mild British accent, Jedi, the words dishevelled and spelunking, and stand up comedians such as Wil Anderson, Dave Hughes, Corrine Grant, Lee Mack, the Umbilical Brothers, Shaun Mcallif, Lano & Woodley, Carl Barron, Ahkmal, Adam Hills, Hamish & Andy, Greg Fleet, Jimeon and Maria Bamford.

Now for all things evil in this world, and all things that should immediately be exterminated before the take down civilisation as we know it. The front runner that complies with all these components is technology. It is the bane of society, and must be eliminated before it takes over a la I, Robot style. Other pet peeves include Coding and all things html, Peter Jackson, Orlando bloody Bloom, Viggo Mortenson, maths, repetition, waking up early, sharing my room with relatives when they visit, dogs that constantly bark, being bitten by bugs, repetition, most movies, music that isn’t good (which is most music), American/Australian political relations, extreme right-wingists, conformity, the disadvantages of being young, people, people who think they are better than other people for any reason, capital punishment, multi billion dollar corporations that take advantage of the poor and the weak-willed, repetition, lollipop ladies, school, materialism, labels, celebrities who think they are politicians, politicians who think they are celebrities, politicians, celebrities, repetition, hypocrites, adults that assume they are better/smarter/more proficient/more equal than us down trodden teens because of our age, religious people who assume they are, to quote Mairu here, "holier-than-though", (to continue with the blatant quoting of Ms. Greenbean) "intolerance of other people’s lifestyles and ideas, closed-mindedness, people that have no reservations against messing with children’s minds", people who don’t believe you when you are telling the truth and without giving them no reason to doubt you, and young people that go on power trips because they inherit the slightest bit of power. Oh, and all things junk mail, spam and forwarded. I could keep going, but I don't think I'll be that cruel to my keyboard.

OH MY GOD THE CRAZY PLATYPUS-HEDGEHOG HYBRIDS HAVE IMPLODED AND CAUSED MASS ANARCHY THROUGHOUT THE PAN-PACIFIC REGIONI! ONLY THE TICK CAN SAVE US NOW!!

That was just to get you all back reading again, because I figured most people lost interest in my dull and uninteresting story some people have christened 'life.' But hey, what can ya do? It was fun for me, and I couldn't give a stuff about you lot, so I'm going to continue. Not with anything substantial, just with some quotes I like. Although there is a problem with this, Whenever one gets an opportunity to shout out to the world a really witty, interesting and intellectual quote one has found after long and laborious hours slaving over a search engine, searching page after page after page of 3 million websites of absolute junk, one never remembers the good ones! It's so frustrating. Perhaps I should write them all down on sticky note thingos that some clever (and probably mega rich) person invented and stick them to my computer for future reference. And no, that was not my quote. One quote does spring to mind, though. It is an Oscar Wilde quote and is somewhat apt here. It goes something along the lines of (don't quote me on this, it's not exact) ‘We must pass on all the good advice given to us. It is the only thing we can find a use for.’ Blech, I wish I could remember it.

A few more I quite like are:
"Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form." - Karl Marx
"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources." - Albert Einstein
"I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work." - Thomas Edison
"You’re about as useful as a poopie-flavoured lolliepop!" - Patches O’ Hoolihan, Dodgeball
"When walking through a melon patch, don't adjust your sandals" - Mei Ling, playstation game Metal Gear Solid.

I think they pretty much speak for themselves and require no commentary on them.Hey, this whole 'blogging' business isn't half bad! Expect more entries from me, a lot more entries. They're not exactly going to be brief either, so if you love a good, cynical and long-winded (and perhaps occasionally pessimistic) view on life be sure to check back here. That reminds me, Mrs Starkey wrote on my feature article I wrote in the mid-semester block exams that it had 'a touch of Phillip Adams.' I was quite pleased with that. Well I suppose the comment was warranted after spending 1200 words on the evils of politics and religion, and why the entire world should revert to Marxist communism. I'm actually surprised that I was able to get 500 words over the required length and a) finally not get penalised for being comprehensive *massive relief* and b) fit it all in within the time limit and not drop the quality off towards the end. Although Starkey did question my connection between Ancient Rome and communism - perhaps that could have been more clearly explained. It made sense to me!!

Well that is all I shall write tonight, I don't want to use up all of my material on my first entry now, do I? Expect another confession of a cynical synthetic knight intended for battle and online troubleshooting soon! Don't miss it! Be there or be a peach!

So long, and thanks for all the fish!
Too bad it had to come to this!

Ahh, what the hell. *does spell check*