As per requests in my previous entry's comments - here is some `real stuff` for ye to digest. I'm assuming that the Sydney race riots of a few months back constitutes `real stuff,` but heck, who knows what's expected of me nowadays?

The Crimson Beach

It’s where you’re from that flames their eyes

Pleas of friendship met with denies

Scorn unsought for laden on your shoulders

All beauty was bludgeoned out of the beholders

Nowhere to hide after they consume your home

No haven from stone, slur or resentful tone

This scenario seems all to familiar

No empathy in their hearts as its your doom they deliver

The bloodstained beach shall never be cleansed

Memories of madness lay ‘til the end

Two sides at war, though a common fate they share

Cries of assimilation asphyxiate the air

The crimson beach lies on untouched

With fore-thoughts of serenity all to clutch

The defilement of such a beautiful place

Resultant from an ignorant race

Reverberations and consequences earned

Now upon those wrathful, the tide has been turned

With as equal malice and many times as scorn

Respect for those rioters all but forlorn

Tainted is the continent, of which they stand to fight

Their very war prize left stranded in the night

All hope now diminished and a reputation in tatters

It’s how we hold the country, not the company that matters

The bloodstained beach lies on still bearing with it flags

Some flown with much vigour, others no more than rags

The deeds upon that day brought many to their knees

Wondering how on earth of all people, it was us who caught the disease

The beach lies on uneasily, to fight another day

Its only defence now is that we don’t fall back down that way

Begotten hope through ignorance leaves a generations heart in shatters

It’s how we hold the country, not the company that matters

Yes I am aware that its poetic form is not how I usually write - I just thought I might be different. Sue me for daring.

DOM: (in reply to the comment you left on my last entry)

What of Ski reflects my mindset? What stereotypes can you place me under through my nickname? I know you only said that because I said it to Josh, but there was reason behind my words. What is your reasoning, other than trying to twist my own words around to make it look like I didn't consider every word of my post? Perhaps you should do the same before you enter into the argument.
Reason out your point or don't bother typing useless insults with no backing.

Nice pick up on the triple M in communication. By 'nice', I mean your clutching at straws. You know as well as I do the 'leet speakers' section of my post was in reference to those who have been subconsciously embedded with leet speak and type it without even thinking. Spelling mistakes don't faze me at all.
But, if you want to turn all petty, I could always pick out the errors in your post.
· mindset)are a - there should be a space between the ) and the a.
· 3 M's... thats some good - the ... should be a ; (it's called a semi-colon and it's becoming a rare commodity) and that's should have an apostrophe between the t and the s.
· Normally i'm a - I'm needs a capital I.
· better then others - You see Microsoft Word doesn't underline the times you stuff up but end up spelling a word correctly. Proofreading would have made it clear the word you are looking for is than.
· Who cares if Andy uses lol hahah, I certainly don't, I just know he found it funny. - This is a question, though fails to end with a question mark. Though I daresay that throwing a question mark in at the end would improve things; indeed not, for your sentences changes from a question to a statement right in the middle. That's not always a good thing to do. Try "Who cares if Andy uses lol hahah? I certainly don't, I just know he found it funny." Much better.
· Your blog wasn't clever, wasn't funny, it was vindictive... - The second comma should be a semi-colon because you are starting a new thought. The three periods that the end is just plain stupid.

There, do you see how useless pointing out spelling errors are? Again, stop twisting my words to make yourself look like you know what's on the down low and make myself look worse than I am. Think about what you write - that way you might, just maybe, come up with an insult that does its task.

And if you shall indulge me a moment longer, when you say "when I actually NEED to write something then I will use correct punctuation, spelling etc." does this count as an occasion where you NEED correct spelling? Judging by the fact that, on the whole, you have written with reasonable success, as well as the fact that you are using a vocabulary that is not common for you (not saying you don't understand it - just you don't use it all that often), I would say that you intended this to be a formal post. So let me draw your attention to one final spelling error. "I noticed one of ur last lines," Your. WHY OH YOU ARE. You see, the spelling ur comes under the banner of leet speak. It has been embedded in your subconscious so that you are unaware when you use it, which is what I have taken offence to. This bludgeoning of the English language is disgusting, perturbing and inescapable. "when I actually NEED to write something then I will use correct punctuation, spelling etc." Poor Dom, he doesn't know what he's talking about. Poor Dom, he CANNOT use correct spelling when he needs to or when he wants to. Poor Dom, he just helped discredit himself with no external aid, and gave me service by strengthening my argument. Poor Dom.

"Also I noticed one of ur last lines, "You should NEVER intentionally cause grief and misery to others" is one of the most ironic statements I've seen."
I considered not responding to this part of your post at all for you clearly took that part of my post out of context. After realising that your entire post was one subverted context after another, I thought I might as well give my $0.02.

I did not set grief or misery upon anyone with the sole intention to bring joy unto myself. I notice you conveniently left the italicised part of my statement out of your quote. If the only way you can bring disrepute onto me is by taking things out of context and quote-doctoring, why bother at all?

Let me tell you I found no joy posting what I did. Then that begs the question 'why post at all?' You see, these things irked me. Most of them have irked me for a long time now so I felt that I had to release these feelings. They weren't pleasant, it's true, but people will hear many unpleasant things about them in their lifetime so it's high time they grew a thick enough skin to get over it. These are only small things and if so many of you cried to you mum about these petty discrepancies I have pointed out, then good luck in the real world. You will need as much luck as you can get.

One last thing, oh king of thought provoking and undisputable arguments, you jump to far too many conclusions than is advisable. You'll wear yourself out sooner or later.

"and making yourself seem smarter and better then others." How, pray tell, am I achieving this? I have not written in a different style to my other blogs, and whilst the tone does differ to that of a more serious nature I fail to see how that comes off as myself attempting to look smarter than my audience. If anything this stems from the accent you yourself put on my words, an accent you undoubtedly chose just so you could try to attack me for something else. Again, you fail.

"Your blog wasn't clever, wasn't funny, it was vindictive” If by clever you mean 'thought provoking,' then I agree. It was not clever. It was an intellectual look at the situation, which could be surmised as being clever, but that is not the point you are making. I agree again that it is not funny. It was NEVER my aim to be clever or funny and fail to see why it SHOULD be. You cannot hold it as an insult when my posts are not clever or funny for it is illogical and biased. There was no need for cleverness and humour, so yet again you bring up a stagnant point that makes you look like you are arguing for no other reason than the sake to argue. That is the reason I looked upon Keen Philosopher with scorn and is now the reason I do the same to you. Argue WITH a point, argue WITH a goal and argue WITH a purpose if you want any credibility. To make yourself look like a fool, keep doing what you are doing.

You call my post vindictive. This concept I reject in its entirety. I could never expect you to understand WHY for it is quite clear you failed to read the post in question, instead skimming it to pick out bits you thought you could argue against and kicking your fingers into overdrive without even bothering to see if you were correct or not. Nay, if you want to see an example of a vindictive post, read this one. Before you comment again, properly READ this post and you might salvage the last shreds of dignity as somewhat of an intellectual you still possess after you produced this monstrosity of rhetoric.

My post was not vindictive, nor was it similar to what Keen Philosopher wrote on French Mans blog. These are the two errs (no, this was not a spelling mistake before you look for something to rebut) you are accusing me of, no? You see, KP's posts were naught but accusations and hurled insults. To put it in layman’s terms, they were 'you suck' calls. My post contained reasoning and proof, showing exactly my ill-content with certain proceedings. 'This is why you suck,' if you would like to put it that way. You could always shrug off my mild ramblings for they were little more than slightly offensive, you could learn from then, or you could take offence and make a fool of yourself in retaliation. It's up to you.

In conclusion my dear Pom, this is the internet. People get insulted. If you are so easily offended I pray that you won't venture out any further than MSN and MySpace otherwise you will be given a very rude shock. While you are at it, never leave your house. Ever. People are cruel, and as equally harsh in Real Life as they are on the internet. If you are unable to cope with these petty discrepancies you will most definitely need to learn to play.

And as a parting remark, if you wish to have any credibility with what you say, I might suggest not having words such as nobshine in your opening sentence. The reasons for this have already been explained, but could I really expect you to read it considering you have read naught of what anyone else has written? Your second comment is plain and clear evidence of this. "You [Scrad] have written are the only person that found Ski's blog good (my insertion)." Yes if you read the first comment on the page, which is in plain view of the screen when you load it and only two comments above your own, you would have seen French Man write "Great post Ski, […]Once again Ski a good post and I hope you will be writing more soon (my […] omission)."

So yet again Master Englishman, you have made yourself look like the epitome of fool. But, alas, how can I ever expect you to READ this?

Learn to read, then learn to play.

This is my reply to the goings-on on the myspace of French Man. It was too long to fit there, so here shall have to do.

My turn. My my, where to begin?

Let me be short and straight to the point, for I worked late and sleep calls.

To All Those Who Mistook Scrad for Keen Philosopher (the first time)
It is very clear that you failed to read her post. How you could mistake the two vastly different works of penmanship can only be explained by the fact that all you could manage was a perusal of her words, picking out the insults, and retaliating. That is NOT the way to argue. That right there opened up the gateway for the vicious duelling of slurs. In the mighty words of Scrad - Learn2read. COMMMUNICATION is the only way to understand one another, and maybe if both sides had reached an understanding then French Man would have his blog back. Too late for that though I suppose.

To All Those Leet Speakers
Scrad is an exception, for he leet speaks consciously and has the ability to speak articulately if the mood strikes him down.
Leet Speak is NOT the equivalence of a Latin variation between civilisations, for alternations in dialect stem from isolation from the original lineage of the language. Leet Speak stems from the laziness of the twenty-first century teen and their hunger for social acceptance. I was once criticised for using punctuation (commas, periods) in my text messages because 'nobody does that.' It hasn't stopped me typing words the way they were originally designed and it makes it a whole lot easier for the person on the other end to understand what you are saying. Here's the word COMMUNICATION again. So please, for the ease of your correspondences, take the extra 0.2 of a second to press shift as you start a sentence, or type late instead of l8, or say 'that was amusing' instead of lol. Even for those less capable of complex thought, typing the full word isn't a struggle.

Andy
The next time you type lol haha so help me I'm going to rip my arm right through the fibre optic cables and make you incapable of laughter. You are aware that lol means laugh out loud, right? You are aware that typing haha signifies your laughter and said laughter being out loud, right? So what benefit does typing lol haha bring? And three lots of anything in one sentence is an undesirable literary technique, let alone three lol haha's. And if anybody retorts me by saying that I have said that phrase multiple times myself, look at the context I have written it in. No doubt somebody will still say it, which saddens me greatly.

Jay-C
Shall I mention the fact that calling yourself Jay-C reflects the mindset you have at your disposal? Nay, I shall let that slide and move on to more important things. Let's start with your ability to hurl an insult - or lack thereof. Is calling somebody an Emo - irregardless of what they have done to warrant your insults - the only way you can go about showing your dislike for that person? I'm fairly sure calling someone an Emo falls short of the mark of insulting, for if one is NOT an Emo and had not shown any signs of Emoship then they will know you are just picking that out of thin air. If they ARE an Emo, they aren't going to mind. So how about you stop relating every second thought that you have to Emo's and start using a little something called creativity? Boy, the amount of time you spend speaking of Emo's, one starts to ponder whether or not you do have a strong disliking for them. Why waste so much time and energy on something you hate so much?

Te0
Let's see. The...err...'worship of a womans body,’ whilst it may be the socially accepted norm, is not appreciated by all. So perhaps if you take delight in seeing a body - an exterior shell with an apparent aesthetically satisfying component to it (though I fail to see where one differs from the next, and why the female body is put on such a pedestal where there are a plethora of other aesthetically pleasing things around) - perhaps you can take delight in this pleasure in private instead of forcing it upon those who do not share your desire?I can here y'all replying even before you start. No, I am *not* gay. I just don't find women who are so free with their body desirable, and tend to be content with those who are close to me (despite the fact that there are very few of them.)And the whole KPP, BP, HP, -GG post doesn't help proceedings whence concerned with the bludgeoning of the English language.

Alison
Do you not realise you played right into KP's hand? What purpose, pray tell, did the posts where you called her a cockbite and a fuckwit amongst other things serve? KP died a little inside when she found out how immature those who were posing as her were; I died a little inside when I read your reaction. I thought better of you, I thought you were a bigger person, I didn't think you'd resort to such behaviour as that. I'm sure you are able to look at KP, see what she is saying and rebut that instead of doing the very thing that she is so rightly outspoken about. Do you really need to fall back on such phrases when you want to express your dislike for her? The fouler the language, the less valued the opinion.

Scrad
"I am on a quest...a quest for truth, for justice..."

I stopped reading here. You, are a retard.

That, my friend, should be published. Although you lose a lot of points for starting the whole 'pose as KP' fad, but how were you to know that people would fail to read the posts?

French Man
The one voice of reason in this whole saga. Kudos for keeping your cool and congratulations on a fantastic entry.

ALL
I had the...divine experience...of talking to KP over MSN. This has taken me far too long to write as it is, so I shall only tell you the messages she wishes me to pass on.

Thank-you all for your hospitality.
I must say, the quality of the arguments you presented was high, and i found the points you made to be of intelligent thinking. *That's sarcasm right there just incase you didn't pick up on it.*
P.S. If people with to continue this debate, MSN allows us to do that.
P.S.S. Left is love, vote labor
P.S.S.S. Thank-you all for your time. Shalom.


Keen Philosopher
Apart from the fact that the I should be capitalised, and also that in case is two words, if you want multiple postscripts (just because you refuse to add these to the body of your statement for some reason unbeknownst to me) I believe you multiply the P. P.S, P.P.S, et al. But let’s not get caught up on spelling or syntax now, for I know you disregard its importance in its entirety. By the way, I’m going to be as equally as patronising as you were in our parting comment and inform you that the most glaringly obvious sarcastic tone should be inserted into my previous sentence just in case you didn’t pick up on it.

P.S. Has this been an enlightening experience for you? Have you grown as an intellectual? I know you feel that you have won the argument. Pray tell what have you won? What have you gained through wasting everybody’s time with this? You may think that you are a higher class citizen than us because you attend a private school, or you like to think that your ‘extensive vocabulary’ indicates you are more intelligent than us (whereas nothing could be further from the truth - only fools who wish to look wise hide behind their long words, intelligent people are capable of explaining things on a more basic level for all to understand – cf: French Mans blog entry) but there is something you should promptly learn for the betterment of yourself and those around you.

You should NEVER intentionally cause grief and misery to others, no matter how much joy you received in the process. The righteous indignation you have contaminated this blog with is the ultimate act of selfishness; a trait that shall leave you wallowing in the stagnant cesspools of Real Life with naught of a life line. Learn to play dear philosopher, learn to play.

P.P.S *snigger* I made you say peepee.

Now now, what have I said about signing comments on my blog anonymously? It's bad! Don't do it! Just think to yourself four simple questions.

• What would RaptorJesus do?
• What wouldn't Chuck Norris do?
• What would Gandalf do?
• What would Scooby do?

When one answers these questions, and only then, will one discover spiritual fulfillment; a state of being revolving around perpetual bliss and eternal happiness. There's that, and then there's (hopefully) the INCLUSION OF YOUR FREAKING NAME WHEN YOU POST A COMMENT! For if you ask what Scooby would do, he would post his name. If you ask what Chuck Norris would do, you'd end up roundhouse kicking your monitor. So pleasepleasepleaseplease sign your name! And if you're young, bored and beautiful, feel free to leave your phone number as well. No but seriously... anonymous

My usual preamble of the incessant use of anonyminity on the internet (of all places! What is the world coming to) being over, it is now time for the amble to transcend from a distant hope into a pleasurable reality. For pleasurable it will be - you guys are in for a treat!

So there was a pelican taking a casual meander down a sun-stained street, bathing in the yellow glow of the Big Mistress’s arms, when he encountered a most peculiar scenario. There, right where his path had led him, stood a man. This man was of no exceptional height, though by no means short, and an aura of dread and hatred for humanity surrounded him; acting as a force field repelling all thoughts of kindness and affection directed to him.

The beige shirt that this man was wearing was having trouble containing the chest behind it. Chest hair was seeping through the caverns that the buttons on the shirt failed to contain, and the stitching was seemingly held together by a higher power for it would surely fall apart if it was only natural. There was something mysterious about this man and his abnormally sized calves, something discerningly unfamiliar. The pelican could not place his proverbial finger on what it was, but something about him gave off the impression that he wanted his identity concealed. Perhaps it was his vehement avoidance of eye contact, or his desire to escape the encounter as soon as the ideal moment arrived. But it was more than likely because he was wearing a balaclava.

It was no metaphorical balaclava either. It was a tangible, black woolen balaclava. It served its purpose well enough for the untrained eye; it left nothing uncovered save his eyes. Though there was an abnormal bulge at the lower end of the balaclava, where the pelican estimated his chin should be. Was the balaclava hiding more than a simple face, disguising more than a mere identity? Pelican thought so.

Pelican was just as determined to unravel this mystery as a baby Labrador is as determined to unravel the entirety of its promotional role of toilet paper. He decided to stare down this mysterious, calf-out-of-proportion man down to weaken his will, or at least attempt such a feat. It wasn't a successful venture into the realms of discovery, for all he could learn were that behind the prosthetic eyes of the stranger were no wells of information, just solid stone walls used for martial arts training.

.....martial arts training?.....

A cog just turned over inside the pelicans head; it chimed one and the dish commenced its frolic with its plutonic love partner the spoon. He had worked out the identity of the mystery man. It all made sense - the calf muscled the size of a luxury liner, the chest with a greater length wingspan than an American Bald Eagle, the aura of ultimate pain and consequent doom around him, the eyes of stone, the bulge where his chin should be (not cancer - a beard perhaps? It must be one stunning beard)...could he be? No he couldn't. Yes it has to be!

"Excuse me sir," the pelican piped up with his Scottish, 'Sean Connery imitation' style accent (had it been Irish, according to Danny Bhoy he would have said something along the lines of ididily-ei-potatoes) "but I couldn't help noticing that my accent sounds remarkably similar to Sean Connery. Would you prefer a mild British accent?"

No answer came. That sealed the deal for the pelican. Piping up once more, this time in his mild British accent, "Are you Chuck Norris?" The hint of excitement that could be plainly heard in his voice no longer saw the light of day again, for the pelican soon after died of a mysterious roundhouse kick to the face related death. Authorities are still baffled (those that aren't are being roundhouse kicked in the face).

So, King Kong opens today! I was going to right tomorrow, but noticed that midnight has come and gone. I was watching the making of King Kong the other day on tv. Holy and smelly underwear Peter Jackson! Could you make any more overgrown abysmal attempts of daunting and pant-soiling monsters? I doubt it. And from the looks of it, the plot should be just as delicious as your attempted Lord of the Rings adaptation. Attempted. Does it have the same character growth, delightful humour and awe inspiring plot development? I hope you haven't done anything with your script writing capabilities (a diversion! A red sun rises. You have my bow. Your friends are with you Aragorn) because they were stellar pieces of rhetoric. But what you should do is have some more battle scenes, for you clearly didn't have enough in Lord of the Rings, and apparently the general movie-going population are not yet advanced enough to understand anything other than 'I have stuck a pointy thing in other people more than you. Me now King. Me now have greasy hair." Oh, and please please please will you exaggerate the love sequence between the protagonist and their significant other? Because that is some exciting stuff, despite the absolute irrelevance of it all.

In fact, the only good thing to come out of Peter Jackson’s attempted Lord of the Rings is the soundtrack. All PJ did was hire the guy to do it for him - Howard Shore. Perhaps PJ should have hired someone else to do everything for him, we might have (more than likely actually) seen an improvement. So yes, the soundtrack was the only shining light from the trilogy. So what was the only possible conclusion Jackson can take from this? His logic seems to tell him to fire Howard Shore! Yes, that's right, Howard Shore was on board to do the soundtrack but was dropped. Poor ickle PJ could stand sharing the limelight. *sigh*

Here's an idea for you Jackson! Why even have a gorilla in the movie at all? Sure, the original movie had a gorilla - but since you pay absolutely no heed to the originals before you, why not just completely change it? I know - here's a novel idea - replace the gorilla with Orlando Bloom! You'd love it, teenage girls everywhere would love it, and you could call it your 'representation' or 'interpretation' of the original, so you could still keep your fan base! I'm sure he's more than capable for the job, especially they way you think of him. I have a question for you, if by some random fluke you are reading this (who can blame you? It is a sexy blog in every essence of the word) why didn't you send Legolas into Mordor to kill every minion under the dominion of Sauron? Better yet, why didn't you give him a pepper shaker and tell him to use it to take down the eye of Sauron? That's all he needed. What was up with that? How can you possibly not have the brain capacity to read the simple quotes plastered all throughout the books that slap you on the nose and tell you that HE HAD A BODY? Do you not have an IQ above 60? How do you propose he got from Dol Goldur to Barad-dur if he's just an eye? Did he just roll there? And then you had the nerve to blame your pathetic excuse of a bad guy on Tolkien for writing him just as an eye! You shouldn't be ashamed of your illiteracy problem, a lot of people out there share your pain and there are many that can help you.

*takes deep breaths*
*hyperventilates*
*dies**revives*
*survives*
*bee hives*

Hmm, what else do I want to say to all my devoted fans? Oh yes, I'm going to commence writing an essay soon. But you know me; it will probably never get done. Unless, of course, my Creative Writing course at Uni gives me the opportunity to do this as part of the course, so that there is some purpose to my writing of it. Who knows - it may motivate me. It's unlikely though, because anything of the sort like that failed to motivate me all through high school. As for the essay topic, it shall be...........

The Use of Rhetoric to Obscure a Complete and Utter Lack of Content

What do you think? Is it perfect for me or what? I suppose I should leave you all at this point again, for my blog is starting to drag on. But not before providing y'all with a reason for my delay in response between this entry and my last. I was attacked by a construction site sign and forced into marrying a gypsy destined to be a martyr.

.....

Just kidding! I was really lost in the Swiss Alps until a flying water cooler until came and showed me Walt Disney movies, which motivated me to grow wings and fly home.

.....

Just kidding! I was really just lazy and couldn't be bothered updating it.

.....

Just kidding! I really became a presidential speech writer for George W Bush until I made him say boobies during an international broadcast, then he fired me. Out of a canon, pronouncing me a terrorist and a threat to Western Civilisation. Canada, it's the America the world likes :)

......

No, that really happened!

But for now, I leave you all with a glorious poem I wrote about Chuck Norris. Don't be surprised if you see it published someday! And remember, you read it here first.

There once was a guy named Chuck Norris
The first guy he roundhouse kicked was Boris

Soviet Russia is where you will find Boris
In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris is still called Chuck Norris

He roundhouse kicked Boris dislodging many a tooth
Chuck Norris took the blue pill and still learnt the truth. *sage nod*

My objective is simple: Widespread Misery

My motive is a little bit more complex: Mom never loved me

Stage One:
To begin my plan, I must first Traumatize a Diplomat. This will cause the world to sit up and take notice, stunned by my arrival. Who is this Despoiler of all that is Good and Nice and True? Where did hr come from? And why does he look so good in a Corporate Suit?

Stage Two:
Next, I will Seize control of the White House. This will cause countless hordes of Corporate Suits to flock to me, begging to do my every bidding. My name will become synonymous with the Spice Girls, as lesser men whisper my name in terror.

Stage Three:
Finally, I will Reveal to the World my Corporate Takeover, bringing about the Destruction of the Masses. This will all be done from a Abandoned Church, an excellent choice if I might say. These three deeds will herald the end, and the citizens of this planet will have no choice but to elect me their new god.

Can you say CAPITALISM??? Muahaha

Get your diabolical plan here, it's where this gem of a plan came from. Many thanks to that website for amusing me for 5 minutes.

My angst tastes like...

Strawberry
Find your angst's flavor


Sugary and sweet, your angst is resulting from... nothing, really. You're actually living a very charmed life, and hopefully you're also grateful for it. If you have any angst, it is probably minor and you get over it with your optimistic and sunny personality before it can get to you. You're truly blessed, but be careful that you're not a bit too happy all the time; sadness, uncertainty, anxiety, and other negative emotions are a part of life, so be sure that you're not simply bottling them up or choosing to ignore them for now, because they most certainly will come back and get you later. On the other hand, some people just have great lives and great personalities, and if you got this result, you may very well be one of those, so give yourself a good pat on the back! Yes...I am bored.

Let's be honest here, did anybody actually think I would stick to a deadline? I mean come on; if someone gives me a deadline I go out and intentionally not get the task done by that deadline.

If someone dared me to write a 50 000 word novel in a month just for the hell of it, I'd probably do it. If there was an international institution with tens of thousands of participants telling me to write a 50 000 word novel in a month, I'm sure as hell aint gunna do it.

Meh, I’ll do it one day. Or one month, to be precise. Onto a philosophical blog entry!

THE SPEED OF DARKNESS
An investigation undertaken by Sam Rozynski

Light and dark are direct opposites. Without one we can not measure the extent of the other, so to fully understand either light or darkness, we must first understand their co-existence.

In the beginning God created light and separated it from darkness. If you question the existence of God, please refer to my Year 12 Term 4 Physical Education exam, in which I put nearly all doubt concerning this topic to rest. (No, I really did that for assessment)

So before God did anything he created light. This more than likely proves why light is the ultimate speed, God playing his first practical joke on his soon to be creations. But what of darkness? We are told that God first created light and separated it from darkness. Therefore the only logical inference that can be made is that darkness had already existed and that God had not created it. Considering that God is omnipresent, omnipotent, all mighty, all knowing, and that he did in fact create everything else that has, or had, existed, for darkness to be the exception it must hold some significance to say the least.

To be the only thing that isn't created by God, darkness could be only one of two things. Either it is too powerful and significant for God to destroy, or he liked the way it functioned and decided to keep it. There is textual evidence to which is the correct scenario, and that can be found in the Ten Commandments. They are the heart and soul of Judaism beliefs, and whilst in the Christian religion they have been usurped by the New Testament, they are still taken as truths.

I have previously stated that God is almighty; however that is not the case. In the Ten Commandments it is stated that 'I, your Lord, am a jealous god...' Even if we overlook the fact that jealousy is a sin, we can still get an insight into the day that he created light.

The Lord, being a jealous God, would not have liked darkness for the sole fact that he did not create it. If God is jealous, which he says he is, then we must assume that he would not have liked something he did not create intruding into his world. Needless to say, if we take a look around at night time we can see he obviously failed. Therefore if we take a look back at our scenarios we can see that darkness is too powerful and too significant for even God to conquer.

If God does not have the power to demolish darkness, then surely he does not have the power to create something greater than darkness.

Let us assume that when God created light he was in his prime. He had all his energy and all his creative juices were flowing. For arguments sake and to be generous, let us say that by some divine fluke God was able to create something as equally as powerful and as equally as significant as darkness and bestowed unto it the name of light. After all, they are contrasting opposites - possibly the two things most dissimilar the world has ever known.

If we take this for truth - that light is equal to the absolute power of darkness - then there are also some scientific truths we can say about both of them.

Light travels at 3x10^8 m/s. If it is equal to darkness does that mean that darkness, too, travels at this speed? NO! Let's not forget that they are opposites. Therefore the speed of darkness is inversely proportional to the speed of light. Just as nothing can travel faster than the speed of light, nothing can travel slower than the speed of darkness. Negative speeds do not count, for they are simply regular speeds facing backwards. Just as light travels at the speed as close to infinite as possible, the speed of darkness travels at a speed as close to zero as possible.

It is impossible to travel at infinite speeds, because if you can travel at that speed you always possess the capability of going faster. Given the formula Vf = Vi + ½ at^2, with Vf being final velocity, Vi being initial velocity, a being acceleration and t being time, Vf always has the ability to go faster. As a (acceleration) increases, so does Vf, and there is no ultimate acceleration speed, Vf can always increase. Therefore you cannot travel at infinite speeds. Therefore light is ultimate.

You cannot travel at zero speeds because, well, you just wouldn't be travelling. Therefore darkness is ultimate, and is the speed you travel before reaching zero.

Just as there are grave dangers that face us if we travel at the speed of light, these negative consequences also face us if we travel at the speed of darkness. Travelling at the speed of light means that we would go backward in time, darkness, being the opposite, would then mean travelling forward in time. Think about it - if we are going at ridiculously slow speeds and everyone else around is going at a normal rate, we are going to see things happen before we have reached that moment in time.

Whilst travelling at the speed of darkness would be handy for all those punters out there, it would be a great and terrible weapon in the terms of warfare - just as travelling at the speed of sound would be. The consequences would mean the end of the world as we know it, to quote REM, so it would be advisable if the government treats the scientists who try to discover the ability to travel at these speeds as terrorists - shoot first, ask questions later. Travelling at these two ultimate speeds is a terrible act, let's not do it.



NB: I don't really believe this guys, just in case any of you decided to take me seriously. Never take me seriously.

I've kind of neglected my blog as of late, haven't I? This trend shall continue throughout the month of November. You see, combined with the very end of school (about friggen time), it is also NaNoWriMo. Read - National Novel Writing Month. It has been bestowed upon me to write a 50 000 word novel, so I thought I'd give it a crack. Of course if I reach the 50 000 the novel is going to be a great pile of stinking tuna because I'd just be ramblinig on about nothing whatsoever, so nobody will ever read it, which defeats the whole purpose of writing a novel. Meh, I got nothing better to do.

So this means all my writing time will be spent writing crap. Wish me luck.

Look at my new layout! Its nifty, isn't it? Don't tell me it's not nifty, because if there is one word in the English language that adequately describes this layout, it's nifty. You see the eye in the top left hand corner? That's none other than Kurt Cobain from Nirvana, and the fella that is singing my little introduction bit is Robert Plant from Led Zeppelin. Here's a secret - hold down the ctrl key and use the rolling thingo on your mouse to scroll down, and more of Robert Plant appears. The lad with the guitar on the sidebar profile thing is none other than Pete Townshend from The Who. Here's an interesting fact - Pete was the first person to trash his guitar live on stage at a concert. The crowd loved it so he kept doing it! He also managed to write about drugs, sex and other contraband issues throughout the 60's and 70's without it really being noticed. Perhaps The Beatles could have learned a bit off him. The cartoons littered around the place are the Smashing Pumpkins, with Billy Corgan being the one in colour. That's because Billy Corgan is terrific.

Now that I have that out of the way, let's rewind and take a look at the day that was Wednesday, through ski-tinted glasses.

What a rather interesting day! The doctor at 9am was a complete waste of time and served no other purpose than to callously rip away my sleep, so that means I only have one opportunity to sleep in, in the next 10 days! It's absolute blasphemy I tell you! After that it was just one saga after the next, which resulted in me finding myself stranded and deserted in the city all alone, by myself, and with no company. This was great! I had a good old chat to this monk fella, who gave me free weirdo smelling candles and some fudge, but I think I left them in Skinny's when I bought my Red Paintings ticket. Yes, I finally bought my Red Paintings ticket! I'm so happy. The Red Paintings ticket is, of course, the stimulant of my happiness. I hope they play Walls, which is a terrific song. So are Rain, and Just People and Leaves, and their cover of Mad World, and Stackhat... Let's just say they have an extensive list of songs that leave an imprint in one's mind. And I got a ticket!! Yay.

I also spent way more than my not so silver lined pockets could cater for. I think it was around $140 for a nifty Nirvana t-shirt, a nifty Smashing Pumpkins (Zero) t-shirt, A couple of books (you know, the things you read? I'm not sure if people like Crapface McCrapbrain or Mika are familiar with these objects). I bought Catch 22 by Joseph Heller, which I need to study for my final English assessment - which if I get an A- or better on I will finish English on a VHA - as well as Animal Farm by George Orwell, which is such a terrific book. Tom was talking to me about it the other week and gave me the craving to read it again, and every good household needs Animal Farm. It's a pity we don't share the same view of To Kill A Mockingbird though, I just couldn't get into that book. Meh, I managed a B10 on the analytical exposition about the book, with only reading the first quarter of it. I also bought a nifty Ramones wrist band and an iced chocolate from Gloria Jeans in case you are interested. It was nice.

That's not a very interesting, witty or in the slightest way amusing anecdote at all, is it? I bet most of you have lost interest now, haven't you? I sound like a tool asking you questions knowing full well that you can't reply, don't I? But meh, if I could continue the trend of boredom for just a moment longer and insert a slight emo twist, I would be very appreciative if you didn't close the window and kept on reading.

What really gets up my nose, apart from my fingers of course, is when your faced with situations where you need to talk to someone about something, but you can't talk to the person you usually talk to because the something involves them. You all still with me? Good. It's a real pain, and I'm sick of it. I don't generally talk about my problems and stuff to many other people from school, so I haven't told anyone else. Grr.



You know what? I think I'm getting the hang of coding. Only very basic coding mind you, but coding none the less. But as for something interesting to report...I got nothing. Except on my latest in class essay for Study of Society Mrs Newey gave me a C for spelling, punctuation and grammar. Me, a C for grammar! I went back and read the essay and I had only made one spelling mistake! Stupid Newey, just because I screwed up the content of my essay doesn't mean that I can't spell.

As for something interesting to report...I've got nothing. I could go on about the return of Anonymous in the comments of my last entry and his "wow...your really fucking ugly" comment, but I dealt with that there. There's not much more else to say, he's just the most dense person I have ever encountered.

As for something interesting to report...I've got nothing. Except my screwed up haircut! I hate it, its way too short! I needed some cut off to get it out of my eyes for my upcoming trip to Cairns, but now its way too short and looks so ridiculous. I think I’ll have to put gel in it, or wear a beanie or something. I wish I had long hair, long enough o tie back in a pony tail. That would take way too long to grow though.

Wow, I just went back and read this. You can tell I wrote this at 10 o'clock at night, it’s abysmally written and has nothing interesting in it. I'm sorry guys; I’ll make my next entry twice as superb to make up for this one. There was really no point to write this one then, was there? There I go with the questions again.

Until I post again (which will probably be after the 16th of this month, which is when I return from Cairns, unless I find time to post beforehand) fare thee well and goodnight!

The glass is not half full, nor is it half empty. It's just twice as big as it needs to be. It's a bit like the Earth's population. It's not 6,446,131,400 people too many, or 6,446,131,400 people too few, but there are some people in the world who don't possess the intellectual capacity to get their thought patterns beyond they're repoductive organs. I mean PLEASE, surely nobody lacks that much originality and creativity that they resort to saying 'I think you should die.' I'm sorry, but I can't even put into words how little that insult actually insulted me. On second thoughts I can - None at all. I've had people look at me and it be more insulting. And they were asleep!

But before I get into stripping down Mr Anonymous' arguments, I think I'll pay him out a bit more. For the love of Pete, if you really wanted to insult me SIGN YOUR NAME! Not only does signing it anonymously make you look like a complete coward - which further degrades my opinion of you so that I will take nothing you say to heart - but it also makes it much more personal. Instead of just being a random tool who stumbled onto my blog and spammed it up (and did a poor job at that! That's nothing compared to some of the spam I've done before. And my spam was tasteful), by signing your name your signing a person behind the screen. So I would know that somebody actually sat there and typed that garble, which would make it slightly hurtful.

Well no it wouldn't because the spam was just a bunch of crap thrown together and posted, but it would have given a higher chance of being hurtful. Silly Mr Anonymous. And because I hate typing the word anonymous, he shall be henceforth known as Crapface McCrapbrain. Or just Tool.

'I really want you to die.' 'I think I should crap on your face.' Do these two quotes even require commentary? I could, if I really wanted to, complain about the unoriginality, the absolute disgustiveness and the down right pointlessness of it all, but why bother? You all know all of that. Instead, i'll skip straight to the part that just bewildered me.

Let's rewind a bit to see what he had to say. "remember when you sucked my dick? I cummed all over your fucked up face.. Stuck my dick up your horse mouth and made you lick my cum nice and good.. Ohhh... I hope you die you scum bag ass wipe. I am going make you take it up the ass.. Just wait." The underlying discourse of his insults are that I am gay, and because I am gay I should die. Then to prove that I am gay he says that he has performed certain undesirable sexual favours with me. Forgive me if my logic faulters somewhere, but wold not having sex with me make him gay? Can you spell hypocracy? Maybe its our beloved Prime Minister, John Howard, who made the comments. Sorry, now I'm just being ridiculous, the comments were at least just cohesive.

Quick recap, just for the heck of it. He is going to kill me because I am apparently gay. I am apparently gay because I had sex with him. Therefore, he is gay also. Therefore, he insulted himself. Therefore, he should kill himself. Yeah, way to insult me. Next time try putting some thought into your spam.

Now that I have that sorted I can continue with my blog entry.

Greetings and salutations everyone who is tuning to my largely overdue entry! Thank you for sticking around, your company has been a pleasure.

So I've got a physics exam on monday, and then I'm done for exams for another term. After that I have to dwindle three pointless days of school down before the holidays commence. Hurray for me and my free trip to Cairns from the 11th to the 16th, with free accomodation and *some* free meals. Anti-hurray for me and my 6:30 am departure time, and needing to be there at least half an hour before my flight. I never knew half an hour existed before 6:30 before! How terribly depressing. I'm not a huge fan of flying either - it turns my ears inside out - but I do love airports. I can't imagine Cairns' airport being anything to publish a book about though.

Did I hear someone say that the last couple of weeks of school have been interesting? Well they have been. I became a champion by winning the Metropolitan Final, failed a Maths A exam (or so I suspect - possibly should have studied, or listened in class, or even got a text book which I still don't have. meh) found out I got an A for my Ancient exam where 80% of the answers were guessing and the remaining 20% were me pretending to sound like I knew what I was on about, handed in the greatest Physical Education assignment Ferny Grove High as ever seen (which will still recieve a D) and still haven't found out what mark my English short story recieved. If Mr K hasn't marked it by tuesday, I'll do something I will regret later! I could quite possibly write a letter of complaint!!

On a different note, I need a Red Paintings ticket. I believe I shall venture into the city tomorrow to purchase said ticket, if they are not all sold out. I hope they aren't sold out, because I am yet to see them play live. Though if I do go, that means missing out on the YouthSpeak competition thing, and I was going to have great fun preparing a speech on a current political issue. Oh dear, I wont get an opportunity to offend hundreds of people at once again for a while, but I would rather go to the Red Paintings.

So, that's about it from me for this very boring saturday. Hopefully tomorrow will be more excitementful. Tonight might be fun, apparently the seniors are going somewhere for youthgroup or some other such tomfoolery, I'm not quite sure. Monday's sure to be a blast! It's always fun failing physics. Maybe I should just write 42 for ever answer and hope the marker of the paper has read Hitchhikers Guide, and will find it amusing and pass me. Or maybe not.

Speaking of amusement, I saw the new Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie yesterday. Or, if you would like to be more accurate, the only Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie, because the original one with Gene Wilder was called Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Bit of trivia there for you folks, you can thank me later. It's quite an entertaining escapade. Johnny Depp was, of course, brilliant, just as Deep Roy was. Christopher Lee was in the movie as well! His role shall remain undisclosed for everyone who desires to see the film but has failed to meet the needs of this desire. I think Christopher Lee has the most amazing voice; it's just terrific. That's also why he made such a great cast for Saruman in what was too hastily called "The Lord of the Rings." Complete torture of the most fantastic books in history, but some of the acting performances were great (others were terrible *coughOrlandovoughViggocough*). Meh, what can you do. Peter Jacksons new movie, King Kong doesn't look too bad, only because Jack Black is in it. If I were older, gay, and living in California when gay marriages were legal, I would have married Jack Black. It's a pity then that I'm not older, gay, or living in California when gay marriages were legal. Oh well, I guess I'll have to confine my secret-celebrity-cruch-which-isn't-really-a-crush-because-I-have-never-met-her-so-I-don't-know-what-she's-like-so-the-crush-is-more-of-an-admiration to Stephanie Macintosh. She comes a close second.

Eep, I said that was about all from me 300 words ago. Though I bet nobody is surprised, because I do possess the rather annoyingly frustrating and downright irritating trait of rambling on and on past what is reccommended. Meh, I got nothing else to do. I mentioned my truly terrific P.E assignment above, didn't I? Thanks for bringing it up. You know, I think I might as well post it here to show everybody on the internet how truly terrific it is. I am aware that it will double the size of my entry, but frankly I couldn't care less.

Just a bit of background on the assignment first. It was supposed to be a research assigmnent (opperative word being 'supposed' - somehow I think it turned out more of an opiniative piece) about why Touch Football is included into the HPE/PE curriculum, why it doesn't get much media coverage, why people's perceptions of the sport are incorrect and all that other boring jazz. I decided to make it more interesting. It won't do well though, I included words over two syllables - Mr Janetzki wouldn't be able to read it! Its blasphemy, such awell written Physical Education essay? It will probably be ritually burned by the Sport department. Oh well, it was fun to write and its sure to ruffle Jetski's feathers. I don't like him much, so I hope he feels discomfort whilst reading it.

So, without further ado, here is my PE assignment outlining why Touch Football is included in the PE curriculum. Please don't be perturbed by the fact that Touch Football isn't even mentioned until two thirds of the way through the essay *grin*. One last thing before I post my essay. If you have read this far - congratulations! 1600 words of absolute garble! And if you read to the end, there is something wrong with you. 1200 words to go!

Children’s sport is as socialist as the former U.S.S.R – every child gets a go and all sports are considered equal. Just as history illustrated with the progressive destruction of the Soviet Union, socialist organisations only operate in theory. As sport progresses from a recreational, ‘let’s keep fit and have a good time’ type mindset to a professional and even amateur level, it grows more and more capitalistic. It’s like the United States and Cuba. Cuba represents the hundreds of thousands of children and teenagers enjoying a game of cricket. The United States represents the eleven men that are currently in England making a mockery of Australian sport.

Sport, as a whole, has developed into little more than another branch of the entertainment industry with the sole purpose of keeping the economy stable. Australian culture has placed a heavy emphasis on sport and its champions, so from a young age children are motivated to excel in their chosen sport. Whether it is for fame, glory or money, children want to play sport. Those children that don’t want to are usually forced to by their parents living their own dreams and aspirations through their offspring. Sixty-two percent of children aged between five and fourteen years participated in sport outside of school hours in the year 2004. Bear in mind that this figure does not encompass school sport, which is compulsory for children in this age bracket. That’s 1.6 million children, all with dreams of being the next Ian Thorpe or Steve Waugh. Unfortunately certain sports have higher participation rates than others, and that’s dictated by the media.

How many female football games of any code are telecast on free to air television? Absolutely none, and this can be reflected by only 9000 girls aged 5-14 playing Rugby League in all of Australia. On the reverse side of this coin, how much male Rugby League propaganda is filtered through all media outlets? Saturday the twentieth of August saw the Courier Mail add a special lift out into its edition, a football lift out. Fifteen pages devoted to Rugby League, Rugby Union and A.F.L, with much of the information repeated again in the regular sporting section. The numbers of junior football players illustrate that there is a market for this, with 76 200 boys playing Rugby League and 184 200 male junior A.F.L players.

Free to air television dedicates sixteen timeslots throughout the week to football matches or shows analysing football matches. Netball gets one timeslot, and hockey gets none at all. There is no equity in sport whatsoever, and the feminine sports get the short end of the stick. Despite the fact that it is the third highest sport for participants for both female and male, netball still only gets one timeslot, according to the Sunday Mail TV guide. This is because of the target audience of the programs – the stereotypical football loving, stubby in hand, middle-aged and balding Australian male. Netball is a pansy’s sport, so they don’t watch it. It is because of this Australia has grown to become a nation who only follows masculine sports, such as football or cricket. Even the non-gender specific sports only rate on the popularity scale with the men’s side of things. If Ian Thorpe wins a gold medal, it makes news headlines. On the other hand, Petrea Thomas winning a gold medal only deserves a passing mention at the end of the news program.

It is because of this that Australian role models ascend from the football field or cricket pitch. This does not reflect positively on Australia, because the behaviour of these role models isn’t something you would want your children mimicking. Sporting Icons have always provided those lesser of skill than them with a role model. Whether they consent to it or not, their behaviour is looked upon and impersonated. So naturally, when a young sports star comes to prominence in the media, they behave in the same way as their predecessors. This would be all well and good is society was stuck in a time capsule, but however groovy it may be to be suck in the seventies listening to Led Zeppelin and protesting the deforestation of the west coast of the United States, society has evolved and changed its unwritten laws in morality and political-correctness. However much the sporting role-models of today want to behave like the sporting role-models of yesteryear, they need to somehow gain the mental capacity to think for themselves and set their own example. The only foreseeable flaw with this is that is requires sports persons to think as oppose to simply copying someone else.

Where does Touch Football fit in? Frankly, it doesn’t. It is the outcast of the sporting society. The tomato of fruit, or the Derren Hinch of journalists, if you will. Its popularity is barely worth a mention, its media coverage is poor and lacking at best, and it perception by non-touch playing people is distorted. Its participation rate, however, is surprisingly high. It is ranked in the top ten most popular activities for females in Queensland if we are to believe the Queensland Government website and the male participation rates aren’t too shabby themselves. If so many people play it, why is the sport looked upon so negatively.

The answer is plain and simple; people just don’t know about it. In a certain edition of the Sunday Mail, there were 26 pages dedicated to sport, with seventeen of these pages devoted to football. Taking into account horse-racing results and boating information, it does not exactly leave a plethora of pages to work with for the remaining sports. How many pages did Touch get? Not even one; it was little more than a column. The article wasn’t about news, not about the Australian team, and not about up and coming stars – the article was one hundred percent weekend results of various competitions around the metropolitan area. That’s some riveting reading.

This then begs the question; why is Touch included in the HPE/PE curriculum? There are several logical reasons, coupled with one or two not-so-logical reasons. It could be included as to break the stereotype placed on the sport and to increase students’ awareness of it, thus increasing its popularity. However, the more likely reason is its accessibility. It’s not only a relatively easy sport to play and teach, it requires minimal equipment and nobody is excluded from participation. All one needs to play is a stretch of grass and a ball. Are the HPE staff taking the moral high ground or simply doing what’s easiest? Perhaps it is a mix of both column A and column B.

Touch Football is by far the most unappreciated, unacknowledged and unknown sport in Australia. The four other football codes – Rugby League, Rugby Union, A.F.L and soccer – all feature prominently in the participation rates of both juniors and seniors, and all four feature prominently in all media outlets. If Australia were to be generalised, football would arguably be the most popular sport, with swimming and netball providing contention. There are no arguments as to what sport get the most publicity, and it is this publicity that steers everyone young and old towards the more illustrated football codes and away from Touch. The capitalist powerhouses of football, cricket and swimming force the honest peasants, such as touch, to the bottom of the social ladder. For shame Australia, for shame.

Final word count = 2868. Sorry guys!

Eureka, I've found it!

Please excuse my running through the streets stark naked at this time of night, but the two things are synonomous with each other. There really was no way of preventing it.

Anyway, there is the complimentary preamble out of the way, so now it is time to move on to the more substantive amble; brought to you by Nobody. The advertising campaign that cares.

For those of you that read my first entry: are you crazy? Thank you anyway, your in the minority. A certain chap by the name of T Bangs A Lot failed to amuse and bemuse both himself and myself because he passed up the wonderful opportunity of enlightenment by not reading my first entry. Though somehow he still managed to make a comment. Silly chap. I'm glad he did comment though, because I seem to have a depletion of those. Better a depletion of comments than a depletion of white blood cells though, right? Right!

For those that didn't read my first entry, I highly reccomend you do so. It's quite an interesting read and you will benefit greatly from doing so spiritually, emotionally and financially. If you have not read my first entrty and continue with this abominable mind set you will be left in a dazed and confused state whilst reading the following one or two paragraphs. What a great song - Dazed and Confused by Led Zeppelin. On my live dvd, from 1972 at Royal Albert Hall I believe, it is quite a feast for both the eyes and the ears. Jimmy Page plays his guitar with a violin bow. Jimmy Page is music God.

With all this banter of good music, I've lost my precarious and easily distracted train of thought. Nevermind. Good album that - Nevermind. It's a Nirvana album and has their greatest song on it, Lounge Act, as well as their second greatest song, Drain You. Curse all this music. *Thinks* Oh yes, I know where I was - in the middle of confusing the poopie out of the lazy poopies who didn't read my first entry. What unfortunate poopies they must be. Anyway, I remember the reason I was euekaring and running stark naked, and it's not because I have been declared clinicly insane. That was an entirely unrelated incident.

The reason for my rejoice comes from the fact that I remember what the mysterious and perplexing Oscar Wilde quote was, that I couldn't remember last entry. I'm sure absolutley nobody cares, but I shall torment you to yet another quote just for the hell of it do. That's me in a nutshell - do things just for the hell of it. The accurate quote is "I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself." Not profound, but deadly accurate. It took me four hundred words to say that...Why didn't anyone tell me I was drawing it out? Shame on you, shame on you all.

Anyway, according to my calculations (read: she blatantly told me) Celeste celebrated her sixteenth (no not her secondthteenth Jon) birthdaythe other week, and I never wished her a happy birthday. So to be polite and to keep her interested in this blog so she continues to read it, HAPPY BIRTHDAY CELESTE. If you ever be cursed with the flys of a thousand camels, may you have a thousand cans of fly spray readily available to you at a reasonable price to combat them with. There's my good deed for this month.

Right; I'm tired, I'm hungry, and I'm waiting for Nick to arrive and bring with him a few other peope as well as (more importantly) pizza. If he doesn't hurry up and get here I'm going to fall asleep. Yes, that's most uncharacteristic, falling asleep hungry. He better turn up within the next ten seconds. Nope, he didn't.

Taking all of this into account, as well as the fact t hat people told my my first entry was entirely too long and if I want to maintain peoples interests I should cut down my entry sizes, I'm going to end it here. The fact that it's ten o'clock at night and my cohesive sentences aren't exactly what you would call cohesive when written at ten o'clock at night helps make the decision to end it easier. So goodbye cruel world, and look out for your next installment in the confessions of a cynical zombie who has as much hope understanding the workings of the female brain as he has with doing something constructive with his life.

Please note, I haven't spell checked this entry. So either put up with it or do it yourself. Doesn't bother me which one you choose, as long as you choose the first option.